ramblings

Bad dreams are making me wake up earlier than usual. Dreams of deformed babies, blood, hospitals, and all that crap. End of pregnancy dreams are creepy. Tony thinks they are also creepy, but he isnt affected by this. I wish I could sleep as soundly as he does.

My mom is also starting to have these dreams. Poor momma, she wants this baby out almost as much as I do.  My doctor said that it could happen now anytime, so now its just a waiting game. Maybe some spicy food will help. I have a jar of curry sauce and hot curry paste that I am going to use soon to see if that helps (or if it just kills me with heartburn). Tony told me not to have the baby until sometime next week cause his next exam is this Saturday and hes got homework due tomorrow. I've been given a window of opportunity lol. We shall see how this works.

Some times I get terrified of what this will all be like, but I tell myself that she has to come out sometime, and its going to happen whether I like it or not. We are both ok with pain relief meds being used and thinking about that does make me feel better. I just dont think about the what-ifs like what-if its too late for the drugs...or what-if the pain meds dont help or work or something bad happens when I use them. Cant bother worrying about that stuff or I will just become a mess and cry all the time.

Its sears days this week, so my goal to keep my mind off things is to go shopping and see whats on sale. I've been needing some sort of pjs for a while. I also need to pick up more licorice as we kinda busted open the bag that was to be brought to the hospital for Tony. Normally he is responsible for opening things before they are to be opened, but today that was me hunting for a sugar fix.

Time to watch some more tv and wait for the last project runway show to be posted so I can see it.