Wednesday, April 13, 2011

[baby update] week 20 - Perspective

Lately I've been thinking a lot about the whole birth / delivery process. It scares me. I'm not one for hospitals, needles, invasive procedures anything that that involves me at a hospital. So having kids, ya...forces me to try and deal with these thoughts. I deal with them by getting super emotional and usually crying.

As of yesterday, I don't think that whole Birth / Delivery part scares me as much. Things have been put into perspective. Other thoughts swirl around in my head now. I shall explain.

Yesterday I went for my regular doctors appointment. Things were looking good, only gained 1 lb (yay) and I was feeling fine. The concern is now my cervix. My ultrasound results showed a shortened cervix. I don't know why its like that, there are a few explanations, but I didn't ask cause I was a little stunned when I heard things like "preterm labor" "possible bed rest" "referral to another doctor". So things are not happy happy. In fact, I went home and looked up things like shortened cervix, and there are ways to try and prevent pre term labor, one involves stitching it shut or together, another involves bed rest. Anyways, so before the end of my appointment, the doctor made sure that I knew to call them right away if I went into labor in the next few weeks, or had bleeding or pain.

So its possible that the preterm labor can happen any time now. I'm getting another ultrasound done, and going to another doctor in 2 weeks, and then to my doctor in 4 weeks.

So I've cried a lot, and then get mad that I'm crying. Then I try and relax. Been sitting on the couch doing crochet work for Sadie's blanket. Hopefully I can start putting it together in a week.

I've put away the exercise dvds, and am just being a couch potato. Thinking about planning some time away from the house, but nothing crazy. Planning to send pee wee for a sleep over at grandmas. Drinking tons of water and eating more take out crap.

So that's all for now.


misslarissabree said...

You are one amazing person.
All the times you make it through your appointments of prodding and poking I am more and more proud to call you my dearest friend.
I know you will make the best choices and make it through whatever happens.

You are freaking strong and I admire you to no end :)

Cin said...

Much love sweety! If you want company some weekend or some evening let me know. I can bus out there. :)


heidi said...

praying for you.

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